Sunday, April 15, 2007

Yoga Lessons

If you want to reach out and touch your inner self, find a connection with the spirit of mother earth (gaia) or lose that cramp that's been bugging you through the weekend, there's no better place (places) than the million yoga/alternative thearpy/quacks that've sprouted up throughout the city with the higher purpose of fleecing high society housewives of their husband's earnings and foreigners of some valuable and much needed foreign exchange. i happened to have the fortune of interviewing one of these gentlemen of higher being recently, based in a basement with the giant cutout of a tiger and lots of mirrors.

Gentleman of higher being: you're late

Interviewer: oops

Gentlemen of higher being: OOPS! oops ain't no country i've heard of! do they speak english in oops!?!

Interviewer: umm...

Gentlemen of higher being: english motherfucker! do you speak it...

Interviewer: yes...

Gentlemen of higher being: then you know what i'm saying

Interviewer: (cowering) yes

Gentlemen of higher being: Good! then let's get on with the interview. Yes, why were you late...

Interviewer: couldn't find the place

Gentlemen of higher being: COULDN'T FIND THE PLACE! HEAR THAT EENA! that's ridiculous, this is the most well known basement in all of Hauz Khas

(Enter Eena)

Eena: this is just not done, it's a saturday and Sensei (read Gentlemen of higher being) has three corporate workshops and several home visits lined up for the day

Interviewer: i'm sorry, i just...(breaks down)

(Exeunt Eena)

Gentlemen of higher being: ok, let's just get this over and done with...

Interviewer: yes (controls himself), so what do you do here

Gentlemen of higher being: we initiate sentinel beings into the mystic art of yoga and also give salsa lessons

Interviewer: wow, so is that like a holistic approach

Gentlemen of higher being: no, it's more of what's called a surround all encompassing 360 degrees holistic approach

Interviewer: OH!

Gentlemen of higher being: Yes

Interviewer: and is there something else you do

Gentlemen of higher being: Yes, we often go out for coffee together, see, the whole point of this is to generate some warmth in what's a cold and harsh world


Aaki said...

a common friend told me to visit your blog. and its an absolute joy coming by here to read you. :)
write more often, if you will? the djinns make up for rather interesting reads. :)

deshwal said... dt it? I expected sum mor fun in d conversation...except 4 d tango dance thing i dint find anything exciting..

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